Radio: It’s great. It’s free. It’s simple.

This morning, like pretty much every morning, I was noodling the web as usual looking for the latest radio news from around the Globe. Since RadioNX covers all the radio news, from across the world and around the corner (I feel like one of those old-timey news jingles should be playing in the background), I never, ever know what news I’m gonna’ whack into.

Today I landed on an op-ed piece from CityBeat. From what I can gather from my limited time I could give to the site, it’s an alternative paper from Cincinnati. The article, The Day the Music Died … Again?!, is a lamentation over the format change of a local Cinci station that recently flipped from Alternative to Country. The 20ish reporter gives us the usual angst of a 20-something, loosing her fave radio destination, along with the usual FUD-ish diatribe about this is why youngish people use an iPod instead of listening to the damn radio. All perfect and I guess valid points…But one thing she said really caught my eye:

“That’s why radio is so (potentially) great. It’s free. It’s simple. It’s there, 24/7”

Well whack me up side the head with the obvious stick! What was that really bad NAB “consumer focus” slogan? My God, it was so bad I can’t even remember it. OK, let me Google it. Ahhhh…. here it is: Radio Heard Here. From the blurb on the NAB Page it says, “radio industry’s effort to reignite the passion for radio.” Oh yea, lot’s of passion there. My God, this op-ed reporter from the Cincinnati CityBeat, who admits to essentially one year of “professional” writing experience (Hannah McCartney states she’s just one year gone from higher edjumacation), has a better ad slogan than all the kings horses and all the kings men at the NAB could muster from their collective and endless years of experience: It’s great. It’s free. It’s simple. It’s there, 24/7.

The best humor is essentially the deadpan restatement of the obvious. Radio... It Won't CrashThe truth, when it comes to advertising, unfortunately often overlooks both the truth and the obvious. Here is the obvious and glaring truth about the “greatness” of radio: It’s free, it’s easy to use and it’s there when you need it. So this morning I give you, Mr. Program Director and Imaging Guy, as an overstatement of the obvious, some free radio copy you can steal and abuse to your hearts content.

(Cue Music: Pomp & Circumstance, Opus #39/Sir Edward Elgar… use sfx at your own discretion)

Because we believe you should never have to pay ninety nine cents a song to listen to music (cash register sfx)

And listening to music should never give you the blue screen of death (windows sound with crash sfx)

That you should never have to give your name, address, zip code, email address and mother’s maiden name to ever listen to music (endless typing sfx under)… ever!

Enjoying music should not involve computer programing of any kind (come up with something on your own for sfx here)

And admit it, your iPod playlists are getting really stale. There IS something fun about listening to that quirky DJ, wacky contests and hearing stuff about the actual city you live in, between unexpected songs. (insert quick & funny morning show bit here)

Radio… we’re free… as in beer. It’s so easy your grandmother and two-year-old can operate it, and there’s always someone here, live in the studio, to call and yell at, any time. Radio… it’s free… it’s easy… and fun… 24-7.